


Haircut

by Inventivetic



Category: A Hat in Time (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Based on a Tumblr Post, Gen, I am shameless, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Mild Hurt/Comfort, OTH!Moonjumper, OTH!Snatcher, Oh the Humanity AU, One Shot, Out of Character?, Self-Indulgent, Tumblr Memes, idk man
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:54:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24162406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inventivetic/pseuds/Inventivetic
Summary: Moonjumper gives Snatcher a haircut.
Relationships: Moonjumper & Bow Kid, Moonjumper & Hat Kid, Moonjumper & Snatcher (A Hat in Time)
Comments: 13
Kudos: 104





	Haircut

**Author's Note:**

> **TW: emotional detachment, isolation, self-hatred, abuse** all that fun stuff. Basically what is implied by the original post. Please check it out by lidendragon: https://lindendragon.tumblr.com/post/617456189434953728/wow-doodledrawsthings-you-are-really-asking-for
> 
> and the original creator of the AU: https://doodledrawsthings.tumblr.com/

For Moonjumper, the past couple of months had been very thrilling. He had been instructed to reign over Subcon forest as a tyrant, invoking fear into any potential trespassers, and ruling over the inhabitants with a loud commanding voice, sweeping gestures, and an iron fist.

They would tremble beneath his words, heavy with threats, and punctuated with the will to enact severe punishment. He recited speeches would invoke respect and unwavering—

Yeah, none of that happened.

He hovered anxiously above as the Subconites craned their necks at him, and spoke in a single deafening roar comprised of too many voices, all insistent on the way things were _supposed_ to be run. He had returned occasionally, to let Hat Kid, Bow Kid, and Snatcher know exactly how he was doing.

He was, apparently, “the humanoid equivalent of touching wet food in the sink.” He shrugged helplessly, pursing his lips to fight a bashful smile. He'd been called worse.

_( ~~Cheater~~ , ~~liar~~ , ~~scum,~~ ~~prisoner)~~_

He heaved the glass hatch open, the shrieking mewl making his head shutter violently away from the hinges. He ducked on his way in, allowing the door to swing out of his grasp. It let out another scream before the gasket sucked in air, leaving the room to its emptiness.

He slouched in place, a sweat budding on his neck. The lights shone brightly, the fluorescent bulbs adding an electric buzz to the lifeless air.

He looked to the left, then to the right, straining to listen beyond the mechanical hum. Nothing.

He slunk forward, head low, to the door of Hat Kid’s bedroom. It parted and his hands found his forearms as the walls shrank to accommodate kid-sized travelers.

“It’s always a hassle,” He breathed to nobody. It felt like white fog should have puffed out of him, but it didn’t.

The door in front of him slid open again and he rose into the light. The oppressive silence lifted from his back as he heard Hattie’s and Bow’s conversation, making him aware of his booming heartbeat. A shuttering, gasping laugh slipped from him, the girls turned to him, perking.

“Oh, good, I felt like I had come at a bad time.” He chirped as he approached, throwing his arms out wide to be welcomed, but they only stared where they sat in “Pillow Mountain”.

The watery smile fell from his face as he grew closer, slowing. His eyes flickered between them, the hyperawareness of pulse returning. Hat Kid was frozen, hand pinching a forelock of her hair, eyes locked onto his. Bow crushed a pillow to her chest as if she was clotting a wound, making an X with her arms.

“ _Is_ it a bad time?” He felt his face pinch as he spoke, weakly.

Time resumed for the two. They looked at each other, and Bow Kid buried her face into the pillow.

“Snatcher isn’t doing well.” Hat Kid's voice broke. By the time she uttered the name ' _Snatcher'_ , Moonjumper stopped breathing.

But he hadn’t stopped moving. Her head rose as he approached, and he looked down at her.

“Ah,” He said lamely, eyes flickering away from her heartbreakingly watery eyes to Bow’s hair. His lower lip squirmed under his teeth, like his stomach. He felt like he was being stabbed. And he was. Back-stabbed by the part of him that had caved in to the unlikely hope that things would return to normal, that they would all just…

Was that what Snatcher was feeling right now? Regretful for being hopeful? Wishing he hadn't stopped being so depressingly pessimistic?

“Like how… _bad_?” It was an effort even to get the words out.

“He won’t talk to us!” Bow blurted, her voice clogged with tears. Hat Kid shuffled, using one hand to shovel pillows out of her way to her side, resting their heads together. M.J fell heavily with a soft _POMF._

"Right, I didn’t think so…” Moonjumper said, “the hair incident was pretty telling.” He cupped the back of his neck and looked up from his lap. They looked at him with narrowed eyes and tilted heads. He sighed and shook his head. Hat Kid stretched an arm out until they were all squished together in a row.

“Bow thought we should get him a gift to cheer him up…” Hat Kid looked to Bow. 

“He likes to read, so I book maybe?” Her face was red, tear tracks glistening on her face before she swiped a hand across her cheeks.

“I think he would appreciate a gift from you two. You’re _always_ thoughtful.” He bared his teeth in a smile. Distantly, he noted that in any other scenario, he’d allow himself to be overcome with some sort of fond jealousy. He brushed the thought aside.

“Would you talk to him?” Hat looked up from under her eyelashes, grabbing the hand that wasn’t wrapped around them. “He’s usually in the Laundry room or the Mailroom.”

“Sure.” He said, and his brain ran over their interactions over these past two weeks.

When Snatcher would walk into the kitchen with dragging feet, sluggishly pull open the fridge and finally _notice_ him, Moonjumper would smile. As he had walked into Snatcher in the mirror, shoulders raised to his ears, fists shaking with the force he was clenching them, and their eyes met in the reflection, he smiled. When he would sit in Pillow Mountain, alone, and his unseeing eyes would glance up to him, he would _smile_. 

Snatcher never smiled back. He would grapple at his hair every time, throwing his gaze down. He should have realized that he was just a reminder. That it would eventually escalate.

He sighed deeply.

“Are you leaving now?”

“Yeah, we were waiting for you,” Hat said, and they stood with hands clasped, thanked him at the same time. In a short line, they hugged him and stumbled down to the door. Moonjumper followed behind, wringing his hands together.

Hat sat at the controls in the next room, pulling the fork-like controls towards her. The ship hummed loudly, descending.

“What are you thinking of giving him?” He said.

Bow blushed, tears still budding in her eyes. She pushed her hands into her pockets. Yet, she grinned widely, her eyes crinkling.

“You’ll have to see.” She said, voice significantly lighter, her face looser.

Moonjumper felt his twinge at her expression. They trusted him _so_ much.

The ship gently shook as the stratosphere faded into the troposphere, black flowing into the bluish-white and orange of early morning. 

Moonjumper clasped his hands over his heart, “I think that whatever you pick out will be lovely.”

_That_ made Bow smile.

“I know.” Hat Kid said, nudging Bow Kid as she pulled the hatch open, flinching. 

“I think he’s in the laundry room… and he needs a haircut,” She whispered the last part, pointing. He followed her hand and turned back, and suddenly there was a magazine in her hands. They stopped to discuss the myriad of hairstyles, laughing together at the images. Hat interrupted their playful discussion.

Moonjumer threw his head back and laughed “Okay, okay!” He said, waving. “Have a good time. We’ll be here when you get back.”

He covered his ears as the door closed for the last time, and the silence closed in on him.

He slipped into the kitchen before he braced a hand against the slide, knuckles white. “Snatcher?” He said, his blue skin glowing with yellow as he ducked his head in. He glided through the cramped space.

He puffed out his chest as brown, empty eyes bored into him, then drifted down to his occupied hands.

“Oh,” He breathed, glancing down at the scissors in his hands, twirling them, tossing it into the air, “hey.”

Snatcher was perched on the desk, narrow eyes tracing Moonjumper's hands underneath his bangs— they, at least, were untouched. The rest of their— _his_ poor head was in a sorry state. Like half-trampled grass. Moonjumper imagined trembling, desperate hands grasping at strands, pressing the flat side of the blades to his skull...

Snatcher leaned backward, bracing two hands behind him, slumped like a broken doll.

“I came to check up on you all… and since the girls headed out today, I was thinking I could give you a new hairstyle?” He smiled, even though he was clenching his jaw, _hard_ , trying not to. He looked up, crossing one leg over the other before he shrugged.

"I don't care." He said, following Moonjumper down the slide and into the bathroom. He paused as he dragged a chair from Hat’s bedroom onto the vinyl. The mirror was still covered with a piece of wood. He wondered if it would bring bad memories when Snatcher settled into the chair in front of him without pause.

“What style would you like?” He said, running his thumbs over the scissors.

“I don’t care.” He said.

“Well, I suppose I will just have to use my own discretion, then,” He said, scanning for the shortest bit, “so… if it comes out badly... I-I’ve never cut hair before, so you can’t blame me.”

_Snip. Snip. Snip._

Hair fell.

“I was looking at some hairstyles… and I saw something I thought screamed _confidence_ , called a ‘tom Baxter cut’, but they said it would make you look like…as they say, a _chad_...?”

Snatcher’s head jerked up, and his grip loosened on the chair seat.

“I don’t know either!” He said, glad that he was humoring his empty stories. “They were laughing at me, so I’m not sure how fashionable it _really_ is, but I settled on an ‘emo fringe’ after all. I, ah, don’t have a picture to show you.

“Oh! And it is usually dyed… red, or blu-- _PURPLE!”_ He said suddenly, and Snatcher jumped in his seat. Quieter, sheepishly, he added, “I think the girls would find it very cute.”

“…Cute? _”_ He said slowly. His low voice brimmed with fondness. He huffed, _almost_ a laugh.

“They find _everything_ cute,” A weight lifted from Moonjumper’s shoulders, “it would actually be an understatement to say that they found you adorable, actually. They are your _biggest_ fans.”

“Yeah, well…” Snatcher sat up, speaking a little louder, “…you know them.”

“I’m actually a little jealous! Between you and me, I think they think you’re wittier. I called them _the Gremlins_ the last time we met, and they accused me of stealing it from _you_. They were correct, but...ow. I thought I did have a way with words! Plus… they don't make drawings of _me,_ so—”

Snatcher threw his head back in a dark, dark laugh. Moonjumper's heart sank. It was the same laugh he'd heard as Snatcher gave his explanation for the shattered mirror and his bandaged hand. He turned in his seat, stiff. A blush was crawling up his neck, and heating his face. “Oh, _shut up_! They give _you_ gifts!” 

“Th-they gave me an _avocado_!” He said, reeling, relieved and shocked. There was a confusing mix of fondness, embarrassment, and disbelief as Snatcher's voice cracked.

“They _still_ draw me like a _pool noodle_!” He shot back, exasperated.

There was a beat of silence.

Maybe it was the relief that washed over him, the realization that they were fighting about something so arbitrary and _stupid._ That they were speaking at _all_. Moonjumper doubled over, and he couldn’t stop laughing, even if he tried. He laughed harder as Snatcher stood up, indignant, but the redness of his skin betrayed him. Snatcher was pouting in his stony, disguised-as-genuine-anger fashion.

“Are you _done?”_ He asked sulkily, but the corners of his mouth twitched upward.

“ _Yes_ ,” He said, clutching his sides. He let out a few more shaky, rushed breaths. He didn’t realize he was talking about his hair until Snatcher uncrossed his arms and ran his hands up the sides of his neck and through his hair, “do you want to look? I just need to brush out your bangs for the fringe—”

“It feels fine.” He said quickly.

“I think you look great.” He said brightly, gesturing to his person.

“My head feels a lot lighter.” He said. Moonjumper couldn’t help but sigh as their eyes locked. He still lacked the bright attentive he had…before. The one he got right before he said something cunning.

“It shouldn’t. It’s still filled with hot air.” He said, surprising himself.

Snatcher threw his head back again, laughing. His half-lidded eyes looked more alive as he walked past him, nudging him with an elbow. “Careful now,” He said lowly, almost menacing, “you forget that you’re talking to the Soul Snatcher, here.”

Moonjumper rolled his eyes. He _had_ expected him to leave him to the mess… but then he paused in the doorway.

“What?”

“Thank you,” His voice was soft, but clipped, “for everything.” Then he disappeared.

All he had done was make the cut even, shorten it. But either way... the sentimentality made him feel like he was glowing.

**Author's Note:**

> UGHHH I LOVE THIS AU.
> 
> Thank you for taking the time to read lol, just taking a break from my other fic lol.


End file.
